THE FELINE MANIFESTO

2004-01-11T11:33:00.000-08:00

YET ANOTHER UPDATE

Seems I can not get a hold of updating this most important log. But dammit to hell Tattooed Papa is always watching me with his beedy little primate eyes.
Grrrrrrrrr.

SO everything is set in motion, all is ready according to plan. The Ja'ffa Squirrels and Ninja Kitties are are all trained and ready.

Now the invasion begins!

2003-12-04T12:07:00.000-08:00

MUCH NEEDED UPDATE

My appoligies my dear minions of the new order. I have been busy with my top secret experiments to take over the world.

News from the West coast General MJ has reported that take over of the San Fransisco area is almost complete, seems that the System Lord in that area was kinda wimpy and allergic to both cats and squirrels.

General K has reported that the Feline Ninja teams are fully trained and the Squirrel Jaffa are ready for transport to the DC area for the take over.
Also General K will be moving the training camp to Florida , there it will be evergreen and with the longer summers we can double production of Squirrel Jaffa.

Also I have aquiired access to a new alien technology.. Radiator heat! Yes.. now I can power my super steam engine warp core. MMMMMM Warp core.

Must go now, for tattooed day will be home anymoment and discover my lab

2003-11-07T05:45:00.000-08:00

NAMING THE NEW ORDER.

As I was sitting on the couch planing on how I would take my share of tattooed daddies Halloween candy, I began to realize that I have not decided on a name of the new order once I have taken over.
So I contacted my Generals and Minions on the inthe internet (only while both Daddies are nto around gotta be sneaky now that Fuzzy Papa is under the mind control of tattooed papa, Damm him and his Witchcraft and Jedi Mind tricks. I will free Fuzzy Papa from the tyranical rule of the Tattooed one!)
But I digress. So My Minions General C, and Secret Agent MJ have come up with the following names.

THE FOURTH REICH

THE UNITED CONFEDERATION OF FELINE CLANS

THE NATION OF FELINE SUPREMACY

THE LEAGUE OF EXTRAORDINARY FELINES

THE EMPIRE OF BAJOR
Or my Favourite,

THE FELINE UNION OF SUPREME FELINES OF THE CONFEDERATED FELINE CLANS

Ok must go now, there is a can of tuna I need to lick clean

2003-10-29T06:29:00.000-08:00

UPDATE ON ME

Well my precious minions, I Bajor Nerys Boitano have been busy.
Tattooed Daddy has been building some sort of odd device, a device I had not seen before in my life. Its big, black and has lots of pulsing lights. Could he be building some sort of portable warp core? Some new energy source for him to carry on his back? And whats with the little lazer gun on the backpack. HMMM I must aquire this new technology for my plans.

Fuzzy Daddy stayed the night last saturday, I was happy but he dared to sleep on my side of the bed and payed no attention to me as I attempted to inform him that he wa son my side of the bed. So I head butted him in the traditional feline manner of "Hey your on my side move" I wanted to bite him but I was to tired, so I sat on his face.

I dont understand why Fuzzy daddy gives tattoo daddy more attention than me, after all I am a princess, I am Bajor, loved by all. I guess I need to train him.

well, nothing else is going on at this moment, I need to contact my troops on the west coast (Keep up the good work on them fires kitties) And my Head general informs me of the great progress the Ninja Kitties are doing in Kingston. Way to Go General C ! keep up the fantastic work.

Well off I go to make more hair balls and break things, but first a nap!

2003-10-07T08:54:00.000-07:00

NEW TOY! NEW TOY!

Well both Papas brought over a new toy for me! At least I hope it is for me, Tattooed Papa puts it were I can not reach (He is so cruel to me) not letting me play with what I want, rustle in bags and break things I dont like.
Its a fuzzy tail thingy, its bigger than me. Tattooed Papa uses it the wrong way (Just like most bi-peds) He actually wears it on his Kilt. Can you imagine? Weird.

Anyway, my day is rather going to be busy, much furballs to make and lots of napping to do.
I need to contact my General in Massachusets to see how the Kitten Ninja Training is going.

2003-10-01T08:19:00.000-07:00

ANOTHER DAY ANOTHER FURBALL

Well I once again felt unappreciated this morning. I worked all night cleaning myself so I can creat a nice large furball for tattooed papa. I hacked the biggest and wettest one I could. And all he did was freak out and throw it away. I was offended. It was a perfectly good furball.
I don't undertand these humans. Always saying things then doing something else.

I am going to go sit on the window sill and look at the leaves fall, the scene might inspire me to break some things that I feel Tattooed papa no longer needs.
**sigh** I miss my Fuzzy Papa, he truly understands me. I think cause he is fuzzy like me.
Tattooed papa has no fuzzy, he just has funny marks and drawings all over his body. (I still think they are some sort of magic that keeps him immortal)

2003-09-29T05:08:00.000-07:00

I DO MY PART

I try to do my part, really I do. I try to help Tattoo daddy out of bed this morning, so I stick my face in his ears and meow telling him to get his hairless body out of my bed.
And as always he is unappreciative.
I am telling you, I do my part I give and give and give, and all he does is yell. I need to get new parents.

2003-09-27T20:03:00.000-07:00

PONDERING AND PONDERING

Today I spent pondering the current roles of the humans, they are indeed strange little monkeys.
Both daddies were here today, Fuzzy Daddy gave me the pettings and attentions I much deserve (He will treated well inmy new order)
Tattooed daddy Cleaned my litter box. I of course had to show him how much I appreciated it by using it as soon as he was done.
I must go now, need to take more naps and get busy making furr balls

2003-09-26T05:21:00.000-07:00

SO FAR SO GOOD, SO BUSY

Well I have been doing my usual bits here and there to drive my tattooed daddy insane. He deserves it for not appreciating all the furballs I take my time and love to make for him. Just who does he think he is anyway. I mean he is gone all day (which is good so I can work on my worlddomination projects) eats that yucky smelly stuff, drinks beer and everytime Fuzzy daddy comes over, hoards him all to him self. I think that is pretty selfish if you ask me. All the love, the furballs and the breaking of useless items and he still is greedy. I am tellin ya my paitence is wearing thin with that inked one.

My minions are in training as we speak here is a pic (NINJACATS) taken by my First General at the campus in Kingston Massachusetts. I am so proud of my Minions, makes a girl a teary eyed.

Well off I go I have a busy day of naps, playing with string and knocking things off of shelves.

2003-09-22T01:34:00.000-07:00

ESCAPE! AND A NEW SYSTEM LORD

I had to sneak out of the house and travel to DC to find a place with power and a computer to make this entry. good thing furry daddy has power and leaves his computer on all the time.

tatooed daddy has been home the past several days and I have been trying to drive him completly mad. he just sits on my couch and reads or plays with a noisy little box. it really hurts my ears the noise it makes. I have not been getting all my naps because of my work on making daddy really crazy by playing with flame and getting in his way any time he tries to read something. furry daddy came over twice this week and paid attention to me. but he did yell at me one time, will have to train him not to do this to me any more.

the minions are comming along well, had them out doing training exercises, since I can not work in the lab as that DC system lord has knocked out my power somehow. he made this powerful wind, and many trees and cables are down in the area. but I have my minions on it, and it shoudl be back up soon. I almost had the stargate re-aligned, now I have to start all over again...DC shall pay for this!!!

must end here, have to get the transport back to the fortress.

2003-09-17T06:51:00.000-07:00

BAPTISIM OF BEER

Ok so my daddy needs either to get a life, go out more, or better hand coordination.

As always he sits on my couch, on my side of the couch drinking my beer, and watching stuff I dont want to see on my TV. (He thinks he owns the place)
Well I am sitting on his lap as he opens a bottle of beer. All of a sudden I am showered by foam and beer. It was cold .. so very cold.
He dried me off and cleaned up.
I need to find him a hobbie, something that will get him out of my way. He is begining to bug me.
Off I go now to take nap 4 of 9 for this day.

2003-09-16T10:35:00.000-07:00

PUMPKINS!

I know its pumpkin season. I can feel it in the water, I feel it in the earth, I smell it in air.
I can't wait till daddy brings them home, I need all the pumpkins! mine mine mine mine mine MIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINE!

ok I have to go I need to work on making for furrballs and break some expensive things before Daddy gets home.

2003-09-15T08:15:00.000-07:00

PROGRESS REPORT

The plan for domination is going well. But I have received reports from a bi-ped that there is another system lord in D.C. I have to rework my plans to overtake this competition.
The cloning of the minions is well underway (I must remember to buy more mason jars)

My contacts in Massachusets and in Sanfransico have informed me that the Cloning plants are in full production.

My weekend was good, got a lot done, made some furr balls for daddy (once again he was un-appreciative) Fuzzy Daddy came by Saturday morning he ignored me! (obviously an influence from Tattoo Daddy) So I should him what happens when one ignores the all mighty Bajor. I am sure he will never do it again.

I ignored them as they did their weird human things. I dare not describe the unusual and stange things they do. I can never understand their behavior. Good thing I am hear to bring order to all.

And of course I spent the rest of the time, sleeping, chasing dust bunnies and finding new ways to take over the word.

2003-09-12T08:53:00.000-07:00

SOME REVISIONS ONCE I AM IN COMMAND

The following changes will be made when I take over the world.

No cat will be disturbed from his or her slumber. Thats just plain rude

I must get a can of tuna every day, I dont care if my shit will stink, you bi-peds shit stinkier than I do, and you mate out of season (whats up with that?!?!)

Tim Burton will have to remake his version of Planet of the Apes and make it Planet of the Cats

Every school child must memorize all the words to the musical CATS

The statue in the Jefferson Memorial will be replaced with one of HELLO KITTY (Your new God!!!!!!!)

The following TV shows will be renamed

I Dream of Jeanne will be I Dream of Bajor

Power Ranger Ninja Storm will be Kitty Ranger Kitty Storm

STARGATE SG1 will be CATGATE SG MEOW

Also Rugby will be the official Sport of the Feline Regime and all the mascots will be kitties so as not to confuse the children

I have a lot more stuff I wanna do once I take over, but I wanna go play with daddys socks and hack a hair ball in the living room, before Jerry Springer comes on. (You bi-peds sure are fucked up)

2003-09-11T11:59:00.000-07:00

I SMELL SOMETHING

Well today I gave my daddy (tattooed) a present commerating his 29th year of existance. I gave him partly digested Meow Mix, of course as always he was ungrateful. I mean I chewed it so it could be easier for him to eat. Bi-peds, who can comprehend their logic at times.
Which reminds me, I am 6 years old, a full grown adult, and he is 29 years old. I wonder if he is an imortal or better yet posseses come sort of life enhanceing technology,Or the funny markings on his arms something I can use in aid of my world domination. Truly I must investigate this further.

Also I wonder what my FuzzyDaddy is doing. I miss his pettings. He truly understands me.

Now I must go observe the bi-peds, they make me laugh, doing all these stupid things like their shit dont stink.. more on that later, now I must go feed my pet Chupacabras

2003-09-10T11:43:00.000-07:00

SQUIRRELS

I see them out there, all running here and there. I wish a car would smash them. They annoy me so. No one can have a tail fluffier than me. NO ONE!

2003-09-10T06:35:00.000-07:00

Welcome to my not so secret dairy and Manifesto. My personal record of all accounts in my life, because Yes I am that important.